Friday, January 20, 2012

Introducing...our Family Maid


Her name is Heather Consuela Porter.

Her passion is clean counters. 

Her dream is to have the never ending paperwork, pens, school books, wrappers, empty containers, pencils, papers from school, empty glasses, sticky spots, plates, utensils, hats, socks (yes socks), backpacks, wallets, binders, notebooks, crumbs, milk, etc...that finds permanent residence on those counters organized and/or gone!

She hopes that one day the rule,"no eating in the family room," will be taken seriously.  That the large amount of popcorn, cracker and chip crumbs (etc) will not have to be vacuumed up each morning.  That the empty drinking glasses and empty snack wrappers won't be left on the floor in the room they shouldn't be eating in in the first place.  She has the hope that wrappers won't be found stuffed in the cushions of the couch or stuck in the coffee table drawers anymore.  The idea that a garbage can is for garbage might take hold in their hearts and minds.

She has a dream that "projects" that are so fun to do (like cutting up a diet Coke can into small pieces, making a cereal box into a puppet, or cutting up pieces of wood that require Consuelo's craft paint, etc) will be magically put away...in an organized manner (and the cupboard they are kept in will actually close once again upon clean up).

After folding huge piles of clothes and placing them in each child's room, she wishes her instruction to "please put these away" will be understood...instead of their translation of her message as, "please keep them on the floor and step on them for three days."

Consuela thinks that she is getting pay back for the many years her dear parents "begged" her to please keep her room clean.  She remembers making a path each evening from her bed to the door, so she wouldn't trip during the night.  She may even have a slight hint of a memory of her mother asking her 5 children why it was so difficult to clean up after making a sandwich (I mean seriously...you were asking so much of them).  Her dear roommate in college even asked multiple times, "Why do you dump your backpack right here at the front door?  Can't you just take it back to your room?"

I mean, who in their right mind, while eating a lemon, (the Novakovich family loves lemons with salt)would shoot each seed between her fingers sending them flying who knows where in the house?

Consuela.

So really deep down she understands...although it doesn't mean she likes it. It just makes the job worth it...because she loves her family so very much.

1 comment:

Marsha said...

I loved this post! And all the other ones I read on your page. I haven't visited your blog for awhile so it was fun to catch up, although sad to read about the loss of your friend. So sorry about that. Thanks for making me laugh with your funny posts. Glad to know I'm not the only one who feels like I'm always cleaning and always living in a mess! Your hilarious. Have a great weekend!